The Horse and Jockey

Come with us on a journey... enter the mock-Tudor vortex. Notice how all of the moisture leaves your eyeballs in a vain attempt to protect your brain from damage. Take a seat on a rickety and possibly pissed-on stool while we order you a pint of dirty ale. Drink in the fetid atmosphere and imagine yourself sat on the green outside in the summer, soaking up the fumes from cars that roar around you, possibly mowing down a few small children in their path. Imagine yourself in this tranquil oasis and remember, it's not snobby to wonder why your stool is damp.

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